One thing that seems to be common among many of the critiques is the focus the church has had, in the past, on rules. This is especially evident in discussions on purity and courtship. I can’t help but wonder, how many of these critiques were simply misunderstandings and misinterpretations of what the author’s intended due to a lack of an authentic relationship with Christ. Let me explain what I mean, by talking about what I know best, my own experience.
By authentic relationship I don’t mean that one is not saved, I mean one that was like me. See,a few years ago, while I may have gone to church and read my bible from time to time it was not enough. Honestly, Christ was just not that much of a priority. I loved him, but not enough to seek him daily. And honestly, how close can we expect to be to someone we hardly ever talk to? Because I did not seek him daily, but only occasionally, I was dependent upon preachers and authors to tell me God’s will. I did not have any confidence in God to teach me himself, because my relationship with him was minimal. I hardly even knew him. I felt unsure of just about everything and constantly felt bound by things that others said, because I didn’t really know Christ myself. And I wonder, if this, is the cause of many struggles people have today.
Once I began to seek Christ in his word and prayer daily, I felt freedom. I no longer felt bound by those words of wisdom written by Joshua Harris, Elisabeth Elliot, or anyone else. Instead I knew I was free to commune with God and know what my own boundaries and beliefs regarding these things should be. We quickly blame the church or authors for what they have taught, but perhaps we ought to blame ourselves for letting them influence us as they did, and not exercising the freedom we have in Christ. (On a side note, if someone has left the church, it is because they don’t have a relationship with Christ. No one who truly loves Christ would hate his brothers and sisters. Nor would they blame them, for the trouble in their relationship with Christ.)
I recognize that some things the church has taught in the past have been misguided or wrong, but I don’t believe their motivations were necessarily evil. I believe they wanted to glorify and obey Christ, but simply lost their focus on Christ. So, I am suggesting that the absence of Christ in the teaching is the reason it is flawed and the absence of Christ in our lives is the reason we let the teaching influence us so much. Of course, I very well could be wrong. But with all these critiques sounding very similar, I have to wonder…. why?